Someone asked me the other day (Sunday, the first day of nAsscar) if I was listening to the race. I scoffed and told the kid to fuck off. He chortled and agreed with me. I find it hard to believe that the country's fastest growing sport involves a bunch of souped up cars racing around in a fucking circle. Hey, I drive my car to work; does that make me an athlete? I'm getting fucking tired of seeing the goddamn 3 decal everywhere I look. I've seen them on anything from pickups to fucking BMW's. BMW's! I thought that's what was considered the elite! The fucking privileged! Shouldn't they be watching cricket and thoroughbred racing? Not fucking nAsscar! I remember when God himself, Dale Earnhardt died that terrible day a couple of years ago. I laughed. Don't get me wrong, death isn't that funny (except when Mattew Lilliard chokes on a jelly bean while driving his Nissan to his Scooby Doo: Trouble in the Heartland audition and manages to drive his car into a bus full of special education children which then explodes thus labeling Mathew Lilliard a viscious killer and a terrible actor) but the way ole number 3 biffed it has got to be the least spectacular way to die in his "sport." Fuck, I've seen cars do about 20 flips, go over the barrier, explode, and then fall in a pit of acid, and the dude walks away from the crash and is racing next week in Bristol. Now that's a fucking althlete. Big Dale decided to ram a wall and slide across the fucking thing at like 12miles an hour. That fucking killed him. What happened to the exploding car? The huge air? Flipping your vehicle 20 times? The acid? No, ole Dale decides to fucking take a pussy way out by doing what just about anybody can do in a supermarket parking lot. So remember, fellow athletes, don't go running into cars in the parking lot of your local supermarket because you might have yourself another Dale Earnhardt situation on your hands and I don't really feel the need to thrust Teddy Howard on the martyr pedestal because he had to get some half and half for his White Russians. I don't think Al Quaeda's the enemy. I think it's nAsscar who's the real enemy, feeding us the lie that Dale was a great athlete (he drove a fucking car), a great sportsman (this was the guy that caused car crashes by ramming his fellow "athletes") and a great person (I won't argue that, I think he gave away a lot to charity, but whatever). The point is that a real sport isn't nAsscar, it's curling. Now that's a fucking sport. Peace out.